And I must say that I am even more unimpressed then I originally thought I would be. Post-apocalyptic films should be right in my wheel house, instead The Book of Eli gives me what looks like an overly serious Yojimbo rehash, Denzel Washington badly channeling a religious version of the Man with No Name and Gary Oldman parading around like a freaking lunatic.
As if that isn’t enough, the trailer doesn’t seem to show any footage of the people I actually would care to see in a film like this, namely Ray Stevenson, Michael Gambon and Tom Waits. Instead the trailer focuses on the Karate Kid influenced plotline of Denzel training Mila Kunis. Mila Kunis! Oh sure she’s great in Forgetting Sarah Marshall, but the idea of a girl who weighs 79 pounds as an action star is completely ridiculous.
Now the question is which will I hate more, the trailer, or myself for inevitably watching this movie?
For those of you wondering what I’ve been up to these past few weeks while the site has run silent, I’ve been working like crazy out at the new Kerasotes Theatre in St Louis Park that is scheduled to open this Friday, November 20th. The Showplace Icon Theatre will be a bit different from your standard movie theatre experience, which is why I am so excited to tell you about it.
So just what is so special?
Bathroom attendents
Yup. Each of our bathrooms will have an attendant to make sure everything is clean and fully stocked throughout our operating day.
Reserved seating in every auditorium
That’s right. Every seat in every auditorium is reserved. Which means you will get to pick and choose where you sit in any theatre. Like sitting up in the corners? No problem. Have an entire party and want to be sure you get seats together? Done. And just in case you are worried about finding your seat, we will have ushers in every theatre to assist you.
After 7pm every one 16 and under must be accompanied by their parent our guardian
We want to be a theatre that caters to both adults and to families that are seeing a film together. While we enjoying having kids and teenagers alike, what we don’t want to be is a theatre where kids can simply be dropped off and allowed to run around all day. We want people to come to our theatre to watch movies.
No admission to a movie after the first 5 minutes
One of the primary goals for the Showplace ICON is to remove as many distractions as possible from the theatre going experience. A common issue is people trying to avoid watching the ads before the films, so they come late to purchase tickets and then wander in during the film and try to find seats, disrupting the film for every one else. With our reserved seating groups will no longer have to worry about finding the seats they want, and everyone will know where they will be sitting o that eliminates any potential seating issues. Thus the only reason to now show up late would be to try and miss the ads. Which brings me to my next point.
No ads
And by no ads I mean no digitally projected Coke sponsored “special presentation” during admission and no ads before the trailers. All you will have is a blank screen until we roll trailers and start the film. Once you enter the theatre we want you to enjoy the movie you paid to see and not being forced to watch ads. And since the feature will start 5 minutes after we start we won’t let people into the film once it starts so you can enjoy what you paid to see, the movie.
All digital presentation
Both sound and projection are 100% digital and you are about to experience film like you never have before. No more having to worry about films being out of focus or brain wraps causing the prints to melt. And in the case of emergency, we can actually pause the film and rewind if need be.
All 3D theatres have silver screens
One of the biggest complaints about 3D films is that the image can be dark and muddled, our 3D screens are specially made with a silver additive that allows them to reflect images much better, allowing the light to be reflected back at the audience, which makes the images appear bright and colourful and which in turn helps eliminate eye strain and the headaches they can cause.
Digital sound in every theatre
While previously mentioned, we are the first theatre in Minneapolis that uses 100% digital sound, and oh the noise, noise noise it is capable of. Multiple channels in each theatre and the crisp, clear sound makes for a listening experience just as impressive as the viewing experience.
Bar and lounge area upstairs for those 21+
If you are 21 and over you can enjoy a drink or some food at our upstairs bar and lounge. Nuff said.
VIP section available for auditoriums 1 & 2
This is possibly our coolest feature in the entire theatre. Both theatres 1 & 2 offer VIP seating for an additional $5 charge for people 21+. What this is is balcony seating for both of those theatres which have leather love seats and tables so that people can bring their drinks and food in from the bar and lounge to enjoy while they watch their movies. Its an incredibly comfortable, fun, relaxing and cool environment to watch the biggest movies out today.
Those are just some of the many features you’ll find at our theatre, along with other ammenities like real butter for your popcorn, pizzas at the concession stand and an easy to find floor staff and management team willing to help fill your every need. But the best reason to come to the Showplace ICON is our main house, which is Theatre #1.
Now I’ve been to almost every theatre in the Twin Cities. I love The Uptown, The Heights, The Riverview, and The Parkway just to name a few. And I’ve seen some impressive theatres that offer great picture and sound at them and other theatres around town, but I’ll put up our main house against any of them and not think twice about it. The seating is around 450, which is big but not huge, but the size of the auditorium is massive, possibly even bigger then The Uptown. The screen is just as huge, topping out at 70ft, making it large enough to be a mini IMAX screen. And if that isn’t impressive enough, the sound system in that house has 3x the power of the Metrodome. Then add in the VIP seating the lounge and all of our other amenities an you have a viewing experience that simply can’t be matched in the Twin Cities, and possibly anywhere else in the country. Starting this Friday, its a great time to be a film fan in Minneapolis.
While buzz is starting to build for the low budget haunted house/demon possession independent film Paranormal Activity, the odds of anyone actually getting to see the film seem surprisingly low. The film is getting an incredibly limited release on Thursday September 24th, with midnight screenings at 13 different theatres.
But so far that is it in terms of theatrical release. The studio (Paramount here in the US) is trying to increase demand for the film by having a competition hosted by Eventful, where fans demand the release in their local markets with a rather vague promise of “When your city gets enough demands, you WILL be the first to experience the terror!” Yet no mention of just how many demands are required to get a screening.
Knowing from experience what I do about free screenings, you’ll need something in the neighborhood of 1000 demands to convince a theatre to devote a 200 seat auditorium to a screening. And, as of this moment, not a single city has reached that magical number, though LA seems like it will eventually make it. It doesn’t seem very smart to make promises, no matter how vague, to their fanbase only to not be able to live up to them.
Of course we then have the new trailer, which incorporates audience reactions while showing moments from the film, which makes the entire thing look incredibly cheesy to me. The original trailer looks better, and is far more effective, and in the new trailer it is readily apparent they’ve cleaned up the images to make the picture look glossier and thus have more appeal to mainstream audiences. Whether or not the actual product has been cleaned up I have no idea, but the disconnect is now evident. Then you have the previous plans to remake the film with original director Oren Peli helming the remake, and you can’t help but wonder if they simply re-shot the whole film with better equipment due to the stark contrast in the visuals of the two trailers. It has taken two years to release this film after all.
And finally, we have the film’s rumored new endings. I say endings, because word is that there are as many as three endings floating out there in the ether that have been screened for audiences. While I know what two of them are, I haven’t heard anything specific about the latest ending, other than it is the worst of he bunch, which is probably why Paramount chose it.
At this point I have little hope of ever seeing this film in the theatres, which is a shame as the film certainly seems to have as good a chance as any of being a modern horror film that is actually scary, or God forbid, horrifying. But I will be sure to check it out once it eventually hits DVD, and here’s to hoping the film lives up to its rather strange, but intriguing, hype.
I finally got a chance to watch District 9 at the early show yesterday morning. Would have posted something about it then but I had to go straight to work and spent that whole shift attempting to talk everyone into watching it.
1- The documentary style is fantastic.
It effectively creates a very lived in and real world that easily draws the viewer in to this brutal and unforgiving, forgotten corner of the world.
2- The film is a slow burn, almost unheard of in action films, let alone Blockbusters.
While the opening half of the film does have moments of tension, the first action sequence doesn’t occur until almost an hour into the movie. But when they come, look out.
3- The special effects are utterly spectacular.
District 9 is the first film that I have seen in ages that I knew something was CGI, but still thought it looked entirely realistic. From the prawns to the weapon effects to Wikus himself, everything is working on an unprecedented level of perfection.
4- The weapons.
Wow. Seriously, wow. Everything from a lightning gun to a sonic blaster to a freaking pig canon. And every single one seemed cooler then the last. Bravo to the effects artists who both conceived and executed these. You deserve an Oscar my friends.
5- Wikus is one of cinema’s great anti-heroes.
Its not often that you see a blockbuster action film have a complete douchebag as its hero. Oh sure you can say John McClain, but he pales in comparison to Wikus Van De Marwe, who is an outright racist and corporate stooge. Yet by the end of the film, I’d dare someone to not sympathize with the guy, nor marvel at his stunning emotional transformation. Shartlo Copley (Who the hell is this guy and where has he been all my life?) deserves all the praise in the world for this outstanding performance that is the anchor of this entire film.
6- The camera work is truly stunning.
While the documentary first-person style is what is drawing the most attention the camera work in the entire film is really quite stunning and executed with great precision. Despite the huge landscape and the slums where everything can seem very similar, District 9 has a great spatial feel throughout the film. You intuitively know where everything is and the distances involved, without having it constantly told to you through clumsy exposition. The camera work is rarely showy, though the utterly fantastic camera shots at the soldiers carrying guns are certainly so, but it is incredibly effective.
7- The final 45 minutes is one of the greatest action sequences ever conceived and executed on film.
Like I said earlier, District 9 is a slow burn of an action film, taking its sweet time getting to the set pieces, but when things really hit the fan it is almost non-stop for the final two reels. Even more impressive, the extended action sequence never feels tired or overwrought, but rather the breakneck pacing in the final act elevates the film to an entirely new level, and truly earns the moniker of a summer thrill ride.
8- District 9 is a gateway film.
As much as people harp on blockbusters for playing to the lowest common denominator, they put asses in seats. District 9 has capitalized on that by including very real and powerful messages in this film, transforming the standard dumbed down action flick into an art film. Even better? The thing is so damn kick ass that people don’t know they are being preached to, but rather discover that art can be just as entertaining as mass produced schlock. Maybe not everyone will start delving into more artistic fare after watching District 9, but most certainly some will, and that is great news for film as a whole.
Despite all the misinformation about Blomkamp being the reason why Halo was shut down (he wasn’t, the film was shuttered because Microsoft was demanding too much money from the studios) he has come out and created a film that is entertaining, educational, morally challenging and fucking fun. I love Halo, but that film simply doesn’t have the framework to achieve those distinctions and especially not to the degree that District 9 has. In a somewhat shocking reversal, Blomkamp has proven he’s too good of a director for Halo, and kudos to him for pulling that off. Now if you excuse me, I need to go write I <3 Blomkamp all over my notebook and cover it with toddler prawn stickers.
10- If Michael Bay isn’t crapping his pants, he should be.
Seems Jonathan over at Row Three decided to post the video of Patrick and Duffy and The Crab contemplating a threesome. But what you might not know, is there are three other fantastic clips circling the interwebs and I am going to post them all here for your viewing enjoyment.
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