While I’m not exactly a fan of Zack Snyder’s films, his personal brand of razor thin plotting and fast-paced action just might make for a stellar children’s film, which is exactly what Legend of the Guardians looks like it might be.
I know next to nothing about the series of books it was based on, or what the heck the film is about, but I must admit, I’m a sucker for epic fantasy films starring animals. Dare I dream that this will be as good as Watership Down?
When I started this column my main hope was to find interesting films that I had never seen before that I could review. I hoped that I would enjoy the majority of them, but I knew that in sampling such odd fare that it was inevitable that I would eventually encounter some duds. But I also held out hope, as naive as it probably was, that since I was watching primarily experimental films, that I would enjoy at least some aspect of these movies, no matter how terrible they might happen to be. I held out that hope until now. Until Mutant. I just wish this day had never come.
Two brothers, Josh and Mike (Wings Hauser and Lee Montgomery) from somewhere hip and cosmopolitan, are heading to a small southern getaway to engage in some much needed male bonding. It seems that have become estranged for some unexplained reason and this trip to a place that they hate, and hates them they back with equal fervor, will be the perfect place to solve all of their problems. That is, until the vampire acid zombies show up and ruin everything.
I’ve been trying to slog through Mutant for close to a month now. Considering I’ve watched any number of awful films in my day just what possibly could have made Mutant so difficult to sit through? The short answer is really rather simple. Everything. It is difficult to know just where to begin describing the failures of Mutant. It is the kind of colossal disaster that could destroy companies. Funny enough, Mutant did.
Probably because this documentary film is about overfishing. That’s right, yet another documentary film this year telling us how awful we are for eating things. Though to be fair they aren’t angry that we eat animals, but rather how corporations abuse the animals and produce cheap, low quality food that they can net a high profit on. But honestly, I’m pretty damn sick of documentaries that focus on corporate greed. I think they’ve clubbed me over the head enough already with the subject. And releasing this the same week as The Cove? That seems less than bright. Granted I know these are message movies, and the people that rabidly follow these movies are a curious lot, but I can’t see them finishing up one of these movies then turning right around and running across the street to see another version.
All that considered, the one sheet for The End of the Line is flippin’ sweet.
Interest level: Sinking faster then the Titanic
The End of the Line opens at the Lagoon Theatre on July 31st.
Once again James and I sit down to discuss films both old and new, now with TWO working microphones! We dive head first into discussing MOON after our gag order has finally been lifted, let it be known that we get into pretty heavy spoilers, so much so that I will actually be including show notes for this episode to help people that wish to avoid them as best I can.
In this episode you also get to hear about James’ new coworkers picking a peck of pickled … ummm … well you’ll hear for yourself. And of course we cover our theme for this episode, When Animals Attack! We watched Link and Long Weekend, and with such a seemingly low brow sub-genre, it will be interesting to see if either of these films aspire to be anything more then schlocky scare fests that appeal to the lowest common denominator.
And of course at the end of the show we once again subject James to the selection gauntlet. What will be next episodes theme? And will James finally pick a movie that I want to watch?
Be sure to leave any comments about this episode below. If you have films you’d like us to consider, or have a great idea for a theme for a future episode, feel free to email us inbox at wherethelongtailends dot com.
Thanks and hope you enjoy the show!
Show Notes 0:00 – Lions
2:35 – Introductions
12:10 – James opens a can of pickles
14:10 – MOON review
18:00 – MAJOR SPOILERS ALERT
37:15 – When Animals Attack!
39:00 – Link
64:00 – Long Weekend
83:40 – Next episodes theme and film selection
Due to a system wide Netflix issue our regularly scheduled program, The Devil’s Rain, will be delayed until next week. In its place I will review an obscure 1995 Austrian documentary entitled Animal Love. A trailer has never been made for the film, so instead I will just post a still from the film to give you and idea of what I was forced to experience for your entertainment. Please be advised that no animals were hurt during the making of this movie, although I’m pretty sure I was during the watching of this movie. Also the still is NSFW.
I would also like to state that I apologize in advance for this.
Entries (RSS)