Living in the Tampa Bay area as a kid, I had three possibilities to watch horror movies on Saturday afternoons: Shock Theater, Creature Feature, and Commander USA’s Groovie Movies. Shock Theater was on the ABC affiliate and started with some psychedelic graphics accompanied by an ominous voice over. It was pretty simple and to the point, and a great introductory show for little kids like me who wanted desperately to watch horror movies without losing sleep later. While it wasn’t the most exciting way to spend the afternoon, I credit Shock Theater for educating me with what seemed like the entire Universal Pictures library.

After a couple of years watching Shock Theater, I finally managed to change the channel to start watching Creature Feature. This local show was hosted by Dr Paul Bearer – as played by the affable Dick Bennick – a crazy-eyed pall bearer who drove a hearse and had a creepy laugh. Before and after commercial breaks, Dr Paul Bearer would have short skits and discuss the movie – sometimes mocking, sometimes pointing out the good stuff. The movies shown were usually Hammer and Godzilla movies. While these movies weren’t exactly the most frightening movies ever seen, they were in color and appeared far more contemporary than the movies I was used to over at Shock Theater. Even better, unlike Shock Theater, Creature Feature usually showed two movies instead of one. And while that was great and all, eventually I didn’t find Dr Paul Bearer’s movies to be scary enough.

And this is how I discovered Commander USA’s Groovie Movies on USA.

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Up until now I have reviewed American films and I thought it should be time to break that up a bit. I could come up with any number of reasons why it took me this long to get to a foreign film, a film I watched weeks ago, and had originally intended to be my second installment in this series. But it really comes down to a single detail, I couldn’t find a stinking trailer for the film anywhere.

You see, I’ve come to rather enjoy posting a preview of the next week’s piece by including a trailer of the film. It gives people something to look forward to, and might even rekindle the memory of when the movie first came out. Now sure, I am reviewing films that are less then beloved, so I expected this to be an issue at some point, only not on my second attempt. I must admit I didn’t handle the situation well. I was completely flummoxed by the conundrum and pulled a classic bait and switch, substituting The Hidden for my original fare. Of course none of you knew this, but let me tell you it was hell backstage when the final decision was made. Eventually I had to personally fire my production assistant because of the gaffe, a process made all the more difficult because I am my own production assistant.

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It has been a frustrating week with the girlfriend, not because of any relationship strife, but because she was going out of town for the weekend. Now when this happens she typically likes to spend as much of her free time with me as she can, following me around, attempting to nestle into any open crevice on my body when I sit down, and unquestionably attempting to sabotage any of my efforts to sit down and write this column.

At this point I should also note that I have a cat named Kali. Kali and I are fast approaching our 11 year anniversary. In the past few weeks I have also worked an unusual amount of hours beyond my normal standard, resulting in my temporary absence from Kali’s daily routine. Those of you cat owners out there will know what I mean when I say she makes it perfectly clear that my recent behavior is totally unacceptable. (more…)